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Patchnotes v1.23 - Time (and weather!)

Time now advances in New Los Angeles City aka Neo Milwaukee. The slime exchange is only open during regular business hours, but the stock price continues to fluctuate throughout the night. Be careful with your investments!!

  • Add a day/night cycle. One hour is 15 real minutes.
  • The stock exchange is now open only from 6am until 6pm.


  • Fixed an issue which would cause bat criticals hits not to land.
  • Negative slime is now persisted even if the haunting player revives.
  • Garrote wire crits now deal 100x weapon damage instead of instantly killing the target.
  • New command !patchnotes which links to the news page.

The Slime Times - Issue #3

Krak revealed to be a furry, Kanman dead, and the origins of the ARG! Read all about it and more in this week's Slime Times.

Contributors include Editor in Chief Seani, Production Editors LemonTart and Tobastion, Illustrators Levy Jevy, Doopedy Shmoople, and Juan the Alligator, and columnists DryIceBros, Evange_, ItsYaBoi, and Skip Venture!






Patchnotes v1.22a - Repeat Kill Protection Fix

A set of minor bug fixes. If you attempt to kill the player that previously killed you, you are no longer immune to attacks from that player. Additionally:

  • On revive, weaponskills up to level 3 (2 skill less than mastery rank 1) are retained. (Up from 0.)
  • Sparring against an enemy faction player now gives a useful error message.
  • ENDLESS WAR now complains about deleting command messages.

The Slime Times - Issue #2 (v2)

Don't miss the latest issue of The Slime Times for some market news, stream highlights, and LORE! This is a reissue of #2 with updated styling by Tobastion.

Content by Super Investor, LemonTart, and Evange.

Patchnotes v1.22 - Weapon Adjustments and Market Influence

Invest and withdraw now affect the market rate based on their effect on the total amount of SlimeCoin in the market, up to a maximum of +/- 3% per tick. Additionally:

  • Critical damage with knives now deals 2x damage (up from 1.5x)
  • Base damage with the scythe now deals 1.25x damage (up from 0.85x)
  • The cost to swing the scythe is now 1.33x the cost of a base attack (up from 0.67x)
  • It's no longer possible to end up with negative slime as a result of !kill.
  • Weaponskill is no longer reset to 0 on !equip (for real this time).

Patchnotes v1.21 - Multiple Weapon Skills

You can now switch between weapons without losing your skill on that weapon.

  • All weaponskill related effects apply to your current weapon and skill.
  • Sparring (dueling) increases your current weapon skill only.
  • Weaponskill still resets to 0 on revive (for all weapons).

Patchnotes v1.20 - Haunting Improvements

Small update.

  • Dead players may now haunt Juveniles.
  • The cap for haunting slime has been raised to 5,000 (up from 1,500).
  • The percentage of slime taken from a haunt is now 2.5% (down from 5%).

This incentivizes haunting players with larger amounts of slime who probably won't miss 5k. Also, the website is getting more and more green themed. I hope you like GREEN.

Patchnotes v1.19 - Weapon Effects

Major update!! Every equipped weapon now has significant effects which alter their damage and can potentially hurt you when attempting a !kill. Additionally:

  • It's now possible to miss attacks.
  • Weapon skill plays a major role in miss rate.
  • Attacks may crit, dealing significant damage or causing an instant kill.
  • Slime awarded from a kill is the sum of all slime damage the dying player sustained during their life.
  • A new command !data has been added, which gives you stats about yourself or a mentioned player, including slime level, equipped weapon, trauma, bounties, etc.
  • A new weapon scythe has been added.

When you equip a weapon, your weapon skill is reset to 0. You can train skill by sparring friendly players with the same weapon equipped in the dojo. When your skill is low, you are significantly more likely to miss attacks, wasting precious slime.

Patchnotes and News Updates

From now on, significant news and patch notes will be posted here as changes are made. Check back in the future for more information.

If you're looking for the stock market graphs, they moved. You can always click on the graph icon at the top right corner of this page to go there.